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Anonymous sent: Would you say your brother is a fragile flower?

Pssh, as if! He’s far from fragile and far from being any sort of flower. Farming is tough work you know? So he wouldn’t be much use if he was a fragile flower.

Anonymous sent: What would you do if you walked into your house and saw Jack having a threesome with Muffy, Nami, and Celia?

… [Drags hand over face] If it was in the living room? Well I could either kick everyone out or just pretend like I didn’t see a damn thing.

I mean either one sounds pretty good.

"What’s with that look, Jill? Princess is a pretty nice girl."

"I don’t have anything against her. She just reminds me of that time I had to go find like 101 sprites to save the Harvest Goddess because of either her or some other deity."

"That was a lot of work man."

Anonymous sent: What if we told you Jack was friends with not just one, but TWO witches. And this one also fell in the river, wore your clothes, and is BLONDE.

[Grimaces] I know that witch. That’s the Witch Princess who lives up a ways right? [Shrugs] I’m kind of over it now. I mean I did laundry already so it’s of no concern to me.

Anonymous sent: If Jack and that witch friend of his were doing it in the barn, or in your house, but were kind enough to sound-proof the room for you, would you still be mad? You'd never know they were there!

Well the barn is definitely off limits even still because that’s where my animals are. They don’t need to be seeing any humans doing any deed of the sort. 

[rubs chin] If it was kept to his room only when I’m am no where the vicinity, then yeah that’s fine. But I still prefer if they were to do that, to just use her house or something. 

"I’ll let you know if he and I end up having a musical number about feeding him, Jill," he said. "I’ll be sure to record it."

"Jack please whatever you do, don’t feed Tartan blood. Or people. You saw how Little Shop of Horrors ended. And the alternate ending.

Anonymous sent: You're a big girl. You know what I mean if I ask if you have any concerns being alone in a room with Tartan for a night. Those long, tendril like roots...

Oh goddess anon… I know exactly what you mean!

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But I don’t want to be Audrey, Anon and get almost eaten! I’m not even the right haircolor! 

Anonymous sent: Well, because he apparently already put one of your blonde friends on your bed.

…Oh look at the time! It’s time to burn my sheets. 

(Jack you have your own room, what are you doing?)

Anonymous sent: Your brother has a way with blonde girls. Will you let him near your blonde friends?

Yeah he could be around them. I would just warn them first. 

You know do the whole “Holds up a picture of Jack, If you see this man, be careful.” (I’m joking of course.)

Anonymous sent: If Jack wasn't your biological brother and did not live with you at all, could you see him in a romantic light?

Ew gross. But if I had to think of him that way… [Ponders this for a bit before shaking her head] No way. He’s still a giant Jackass. I would probably tolerate him less.

Plus it’s pretty weird to like someone who looks very similar to you.